Showing posts with label Slashwrestling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Slashwrestling. Show all posts

Sunday, 11 October 2009

10/7/02 - SlashWrestling Third Anniversary Thing!

OMG! It's SlashWrestling's third birthday today! And by a Amazing
coincident, it si also my tenth anniversary on teh internet! I started
reporting HOT NEWZ ten years ago to this day! Back then only four people
read the wrestling observer and everyone else thought wrestling was real!
but then I shocked them all by revealing the reuslts of SummerSlam 92 weeks
before it happened (though the WWF took out the part where the Bulldog
ripped up the British flag and powerslammed Diana Hart for some reason!)!!!
So its thanx to internet pioneers like myself that CRZ has a job on
SlashWrestling today!


Anyway, I get THOUSANDS and HUNDREDS of emailz from HotNewzaholics every
day, asking me question. So I'm going to answer some of them now, RIGHT
HERE IN THIS VERY COLUM! And here I go!


HardKore Hak writes


Hey man, coud you please tell me the origin of Mick Foley's famous
catchphrase "mmm, beefy!"?


Of course I can! It all started when Vince Russo was booking crazy angles
in the WWF in 1998. and there was an angle where Val Venis had a threesome
with Taka Michinoku's wife and sister! So Take went to Japan and brought
back three samuria warriors with him! And then he said to Val "I choppy
choppy your big american pee pee!" and he cut it off! Then they made sushi
out of it and Mick Foley ate some and said "mmm, beefy!". I hope that
answeres your question!


NekroPhille writes


Dood, who invented the ladder match?


Glad u asked! The ladder match was invented by Matt and Jeff Hardy in there
own back yard when Matt was 8 and Jeff was 5!!


ILUVKANE writes


Kane has the hottest body alive, but what does he look like under that
mask?


Do you remember the fake Undertaker the million dollar man bought? That's
the same actor who plays Kane! Only now he wears kewl burn make-up on his
face incase his mask ever falls off!!!


Mr Stumpy writes


How did Big Show's dead daddy really die?


In a car accident. But they used his real funeral in that angle with teh
Big Bossman for realism!


ROCKYSUX writes


Rock Sux!


THAT'S NOT A QUESTION YOU GAYOSEXUAL!


SlashWrestling related sign ideas!


Visit SlashWrestling.com, it's got pictures of hot chick!


If I can be serious for a minute...SlashWrestling owns!


I'd rather be at (home reading) Slash! (than in this arena!)


CRZ's hair is longer than Stacy Keibler's legs!


...uhh, that's all I can think of. Maybe you could also draw a cartoon
picture of CRZ giving Scott Keith a stunner!


Since it's Slash's third birthday, I decided to ask some WWE superstars to
send CRZ their well wishes!


Brad Shaw: Happy anniversary CRZ! You know, it was Crash Holly's third
anniversary in the WWE earlier this month, so I gave him an extra special
present in the showers! Perhaps I could give that present to you too, CRZ!


Steve Blackman: Happy third anniversary! Please continue to send me money.


Chris Jericho: Happy birthday, jerky! You know, of all the bitter, twisted,
jaded, brutal, disgusting, skanky, trashbag SMARKS on the internet, you're
the one I hate the most! I do have a few suggestions on how to improve your
site, however. Firstly, when I do a move, such as a lionsault, make sure to
call it a "graceful lionsault". Also, make sure to give a star rating to
all my matches. As a point of reference, my match with John Cena on
Smackdown was ****3/4. And finally, and most importantly, please call me
"Christ" Jericho, because all you internet assclowns should worship me!


Tazz: Yeah, three years of Slash, yeah, you know, growing up in the HOOK,
yeah, Brooklyn style, you know, yeah, we didn't have none of those fancy
computers, no, we just had RATS and USED NEEDLES to play with, yeah.


Perry Saturn: Some wrestling webistes suck, but others are SlashWrestling.
You're welcome.


RVD: Whatever.


Well that's all for now! Sorry this is so short, CRZ, but I hav a hot date
with a hot girl tonite! I'm going to try and touch her! Anyway, I hope you
have three more great yeas before you decide that your wasting your life and
get a real job! JOKE LOL! SEe you all soon!


DO JAKE THE SNAKE AND
JOHNNY THE BULL PRACTICE BEASTALITY? DID SABLES BREASTS EXPLODE AND KILL
MARC MERO? DID RICK RUDE LEAVE ALL HIS MONEY TO HARVEY WIPPLEMAN? OF
COURSE NOT! BUT FOR HOT NAKED NUDE PICTURES OF CRZ IN THE NUDE CLICK
HERE!

Thursday, 20 August 2009

22/11/01 - The first to appear on Slashwrestling (remember that!?)!

I AM BACK WIT HOT NEWZ! And the big newz is taht there si no more alliancE! No more EC DUB YA and know more Duble ya see double ya!!! And all the wrestlers that were in the alliance are FIRED! And you will never see them agains and they all wrestle for XWF with Hulk Hogan and the Ultimate Warror now! apart from dee dee pee, he's retired and hes going to be a motivateonal singer now!

RICK FLARE SIGNS WITH TEH WWF! Ric Flair isnt really the half owner though, tahts just an angle! But he did sign a 25 year contract and he will be with the wwf until he DIES of old age which might be quite soon lol!

Eddy Guerrer is in jail cause he get high and he lost his job cause he got high and his wife left him for dean malenko cause he got high lol!

Rikishi has lost 100 hundred pounds lb and is going to be a light crusierweight when he coems back!

Hardcore holly is getting a new robot arm made for him and it'll be likes luke skywalkers arm in the empire strike back! And he'll be out of action for five years but when he comes back he'll get a big push!

Tripel H is still recovering from his leg breaking and he has been shagging stephanie in his time off the lucky basturd lol and he'll be back at royal rumbel cause there will be a mystery enterant and that mystery man is TEH GAME! And he is number 30 and he wins when he throws out Albert then JR sez "MY GAWD IN HEAVEN AND SWEET BABY JESUS TOO, KING, I CAN'T FUCKING BELIEVE MY FUCKING EYES!"!

As you know the king is back!" This is becuze Vince fired Paul Heyman (or should I say Paul GAYheyman lol) for shotting on vince on smcakdonw so they needed a replacement! So vince said that King can cume back but only if he divorces the Kat! So King divorced that slut and married a 16 year old and is now back in the WWFE welcome back the king!

Test and Stacy keibler will be having sex on Raw but GTV (tahts Gillberg TV BTW) will catch them and King will say "whooo, I can see the PUPPIES!" but Stacy will still have her bra on and teh fanz will boo and Test will say "these puppiez are only for me!" and he'll give the GTV camera the big boot!

Matt and Jeff will break up when Matt catches Jeff in bed with Lita and Matt sez "Jeff, I thought you were gay!?" and Jeff sez, "you mean Lita's a women!"? and Matt sez "HUUUUUUH" and then u can see lita's thong!

Booker T is out of a job now that the alliance lost so I thought I would get an exclusive phone interview with him! And here it si an exclusive phone interview with booker t conducted by me over the phone with booker T!

Me: Hey dood.

Booker: Hello.

Me: So how does it feel to be out of a job!?

Booker: The Bookerman will be back soon.

Me: But the alliance is gonnee! Ur fired!

Booker: Uh kid, that's just a storyline.

Me: Huh?

Booker: It's just an angle.

Me: Waht do you think of curt angel?

Booker: Kurt's a great wrestler and I have a lot of respect for him.

Me: But he turned on teh Alliance and cost u you're job!

Booker: Uh, yeah, right...I hate that sucka!

Me: Is Mister T really ur father?

Booker: Of course not.

Me: OH!

Booker: ...

Me: ....

Booker: Don't you have any more questions?

Me: Oh yeah, why do you stare at ur hand like taht? Is it cuse u use your hand to masturwank?

Booker: Masturwank? What the hell is wrong wit chu?

Me: Who is your best friend in wrestling is it stone cold?

Booker: My best friend is probably Shane McMahon.

Me: Why hes gay why are you not friends with stone cold?

Booker: Look, kid, ask a decent question or the Bookerman will give you an axe kick!

Me: OH no! But you never beat anyone with the axe kick!

Booker: Teh Suckas won't sell it!

Me: Is it true the you never won the double ya see double ya titel cause you are black and the good old boyz were holding the brothers down?

Booker: Uh, kid, I'm a five time WCW world champion.

Me: lol

Booker: Did you just say lol?

Me: lol

Booker: You didn't say that. TELL ME you did NOT just say that...

Me: lol

Booker: I'm hanging up...

Me: No wait I have a nother question!

Booker: Okay, but make it a good one.

Me: Who wsa your toughest opponent?

Booker: Good question. I've fought a lot of good ones, but my toughest was probably the Rock.

Me: Yeah the rock kicked your ass, SUCKAAAA!

Booker: I'm about to hang up again...

Me: WAIT! One more question, booker, who tought you how to do the spinaroonie? Was it mark madden?

Booker: That fat bastard? Hell no! It was my brotha, Stevie Ray.

Me: you have a brotha?

Booker: uh, yeah. He was my tag partner in WCW, fool.

Me: Oh, I never watched WCW.

Booker: Why not?

Me: Because WCW is 4 FAGZ!

Booker: Goodbye.

Me: GOODBYE YOU FAGGOT!

(interview ends)

whgat a homosexual booker tea si!

BACK WIT MOR EHOYT NEWAS 4 MYE HOMIEZ SOON!!!!!@!@@!!!??!!!!!

FORMER WWF SUPERSTAR TATANKA ARRESTED FOR MAN SLAUGHTER? HULK HOGAN TO BE MYSTERY ENTERY IN THE ROYAL RUMBLE? JAKE THE SNAKE TO SELL HIS BODY FOR CRACK? KANE TO BE UNMASKED AS PYCHO SID? PLUS HOT NAKED PICTURES OF TORRIE WILSON AND TAJIRI IN A JAPENESE BATH HOUSE, WEARING THONGS WITH VISIBLE NIPPLE SLIP WHILE TRISH STRATUS WATCHES SHAVING HER LEGS CLICK HERE!!!