Here they is!
"Hey man! I was at smackdown last night in Madison Squared Gardens and Ive got the rapings resutlts for ur kewl site!
DARK MATCHES! I was surprised that they didn't turn the lights out for the dark matcheS!!! ADn in the first one, Sick Boy beat Beau Dupp and in the second one Russ Hass beat Brock Lesner then finally Randy Orton beat Shelton Bejamin and all these matches sucked cuz I didn't know who the people were and I bet they were never in ECWDUBYA and dont know the meaning of hardcore!
HEAT MATCHES! Tazz cumes out and I chant, YOU SOLD OUT, YOU SOLD OUT and he spits at me!
Albert and Scotty 2 Hotty beat Lance Storm and Justin Incredible with a double worm. THEY ARE WASTING THE IMPACT PLAYAZ!!!
Kidman beat Funkai: YAWN, these guys aren't hardcore!
Chavo beat Crash: I chanted EDDY GOT FIRED at Chavo and he startedd crying!
SMACKDOWN TAPINGS!! Lilian sang america the beautiful and I could see up her skirt!
Undertaker beat William Regal: This was a greate match! Undertaker is the only WWF guy who could survive in ECWDUB and he isn't old or fat and he DOES sell moves and hes a technical wrestling king and Scott Keith can suck my ass! Undertake one with the last ride in 90 seconds.
Kane beat Kurt Angle: Kane is good but he ain't as good as the old dead man! And he made Kurt tap to his own ankle lock and Kurt was crying into his milk afterwards!
Paul Heyman did a promo and it was hardcore! At first I chanted "YOU SOLD OUT" to Heyman but at the end I was chanting "EC DUB YA!" cus Paul E told the TROOTH about how ECW invented hardcore wrestling and WWF stole it and how ECW was the first company to use tables and chairs and ladders and beer and how the WWF stole Stone Cold and Triple H from EC DUB YA! And then Vince came out and said "WHAT THE HELLLLL are tyou talking about, stop shooting!" but Paul E kicked him in the ballz! And I think Paul E is a face now cause everfyone was chating ECWDUB with me!
Jericho beat Saturn: Who cares, neither of these guyz were ever in ECDUB!
Backstage, Edge was drinking some water then Christian walked up and sed "I totally peed in that water, bro!" and Edge spat it on Christian and chased him but he ran rite into Test big boot and Christian said "I didn't pee, but our mom did a shit 27 years ago when she gave birth to you!"
DDP beat Tajiri after William Regal threw hot tea in Tajiri's eyes and Tajir staggerd around blind but he still kicked Regal in the ears then challenged him to a blidnfold match on Sunday!
Big Show came out dressed as Andre the gian and said Andre was his dad who died from cancer wrestlig Big John Stuff for the WWF and he'll win at Survivor Series for Andre but then the Big Bossman came out and said "hey big freakshow, I'm the biggest newest memmber of the alliance and by the way, I was wrestling Andre when he died and I killed that big nasty bastard!" and Big Show started crying and Bossman sprayed pepper in his eyes and hit him with his stick and sed "your serving hard time, just like your dead daddy is in hell, BOY!"
Dudleys beat Palumbo and Billy Gunn and Billy and Chuck nearly fought afterwards but then they hugged and Billy said, "come on, I'll show you why they call me the ass man!" and they touched each other on the balls and went backstage!
Lita beat Ivory and I could see Lita thongs and the top of her ass and it ruled and then afterwards Jeff Hardy came out and hugged Lita then Matt came out and said "get you hands off my bitch!" and gave him the twist of fate but then Lita said "dont call me a bitch Matt I'm serious" and Matt said "don't go there girlfriend" and Lita said "no matt I'm serious don't call me a girlfirned I mean a bitch and matt no matt I'm serious Matt" and Matt gave her the twist of fat and said "I'm sick of having sex with your ass!" and walked away and we all booed and then a fan tried to jump into the ring to rape Lita but I stopped him and everyone cheered me and Lita kissed me on the cheek...THE BUTT CHEEK!
Hahaha,I made that up1
The Hurrican beat Dean Malenko: Then then Dean said "i've been in a wrestling for 31 years and now its time to retire" but no one cared and I sand "nanana na, na na na na, hey hey hey, good riddance!" and everyone laffed at Dean and then climbed on top of the titan tron and said he'll kill himself but Chris Benwah came out in a neckbrace and said Dean has so much to live for and Dean said "like what?" and Benwah said "good point!" and Dean jumped!
Main event was a singing contest between Austin and The Rock again and Austin sang Enimen and he said "Hi, my name is WHAT? My name si WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?" and he said what for ten minutes straigth then the crowd said what for 23 minutes then Rock said what for half an hour then Austin said "DTA YOU PIECE OF SHIT" and stunned the Rock then Booker T came out and said "SUCKA, this has GOTS to be a dancing contest" and Austin did the spinarronie but then The Rock did a better Spinaroonie and Booker sed Rock wins so Austin stunned Booker and Rock sang "aMerican pie" but he sang it as "poontang pie" and he said Autin doesn't like Poontang and he has a bigger strudel than Austin and he also has bigger BALLS than the Austin and Austin said he has a 24 inch ratlesnake and he was going to get it out but Val VEnis came back and said it is unaccpetable to show your dick on tee vee so rock stunn4d him and Austin did the People elbow and then Rock and Austin hugged but Jericho came out and said Rock is a tratior for hugging Austin but then RVD came out and said Austin is a trator for hugging Rock but then RVD stunned Austin and Jericho rock bottomed Rock and then Jerich hugged RVD but RVD busted him open by accident on the hug so JEricho gave RVD a neckbreaker and JEricho was the last man standing and JR scream "WILL IT BE LIKE THIS THIIS SUNDAY TUNE IN TO FIND OUT" then he thought the show was over and said "that oughta to hold those little SOBs" but Mitchell Cole sais "we're still on the air!" so JR give Micheal Mole a wedgie to a big pop and said "SUCK IT!"
And that is what happened at Smackdonw tapings!"
Wow, JR said SUCK IT? Are you sure he didn't say "I suck!" lol back soon wit more newz for all my homiez!