this Monday the NWO is definatley going to be in the HIZZOOOOOOOUSE! And
Vince will have them kill the WWF in there own special ways! And Nash will
kill the WWF by being so lazy that everyone falls asleep! And Scott Hall
wiill kill wrestling by being drunk and puking on everyone and scratching
everyone with his car keys! And Hulk Hogan will kill the WWF by no selling
everyones finishers and being bald lol!
Goldust will reveal who he is after on Raw and he will reveal that he is
after Shawn Stasiak! And it is because Stasiak stole Terri "Nipplez"
Runnels from him when he was Meat! And also Stasiak was his partner in GTV
but Stasiak got caught with the tape recorder in his trunks and ruined the
There's a rumour that Tripel H is a gayosexual! And this rumour started
because Rock said Tripel H is "part queer" on some video three years ago!
And also Chyna loooks a bit like a man. But he might just be bigayual.
There's a hot rumour that Stacy Keibler is pregnant! And she won't know who
the father is, D-Von or Bubba!!! And they'll wait to see if the baby is
black or white but when it's born the baby is Chinese!!!! So Bubba and
D-Von 3D Funkai, TAKA~! and Tajiri! But then Stacy reveals that the father
is really Mister Fuji! And Bubba says "D-Von get the chop sticks!" because
he is a racialist. but it's just a rumour.
Brad Shaw has been bulliying more peepz backstage! first, he hid Crash
Hollys wrestling trunks when Crash was in the shower, so Crash had to
wrestle NAKED on Metal (they edited it out you perverts!). then when Maven
introduced himself to Brad Shaw backstage, Brad kicked him in the balls and
shaved his eyebrows off! And when Tazz was eating chips, Bradshaw dipped
the chips in poo and said "eat it BITCH" to Tazz and Tazz had to eat the poo
covered chips! That Brad Shaw's such a ribber!
The WWF has scrapped the Hardcore title because undertakers lost the belt!!!
Madusa is coming to back to the WWF soon and she says that when you look at
her you turn to stone but the King says that when he looks at her his dick
goes hard like a stone lol!
There will be a new angle where Big Show is slow and lazy in the ring (how
will we know the difference lol) and JR will draw attention to it on Raw by
saying "SWEET FUCKING JESUS, LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT FAT BASTARD'S ASS,
KING! THAT'S THE BIGGEST FUCKING ASS I'VE EVER SEEN, BY GAWD!". It will be
a really subtle angle.
My sources got me the card for the next WWA ppv!
Phycosysis (sp) vs A Jabroni Named Juvi (lol!) in a hell in a cell TLC
Disco and the Disco Duck vs Grand Masta Sexay and the Sexay swan (a women
dressed as a swan!).
Gangrel vs Luna in a spousal abuse match!
Crow Bar vs Daffney in a hardcore evening gown pole on a pole match with
Norman Smiley as the special guest black referee!
Lenny vs Lodi in a fudge packer match where you have to pack your oppent
into a case of fudge!
Road Dogg vs Jeff Jarret in a microphone on a pole match where the winner is
the first person to sing "with my baby tonight" first!
Plus Scott Steiner swearing at fans then pounding fans with his roid filled
body and Bret Heart rambling on about how he never put any young talent
OMG EVEN MORE SIGN IDEAS!!!
CRZ is walking...TO THE BATHROOM!
I'd rather be on Venus (meeting hot aliens!)
Matt and Jeff are incest homos I HAVE PROOF (in my pants!)!!!
Rick Flair was on Noah's Ark!!!!!
Mr Pefect has poor eye sight and therefore is not perfect!!!
Sara Undertaker is my FATHER!
Chyna has huge boobies...I would know....I sucked them!
JR ate my sign with BBQ sauce!!!
Rikishi The Real Ass Man...cuz he's a fat shit!!!!!!!
ROTFLMAO! Thanx to Mr. Stumpy for contributing!!!
Now for this weeks interview with Kane
Me: THAT'S GOTTA BE KANE, THAT'S GOTTA BE KANE!
Me: Did you like my Vince impression dood?
Kane: Uh, yeah, very funny.
Me: Lol I know. Hwo did you learn to tallk?
Kane: Uh, you want a kayfabe answer?
Me: What the hell is kayfabe!?
Kane: Uh, okay, X-Pac taught me how to speak.
Me: Then he stole Tori OMG!
Me: You must have been happy, Tori was ugly!! She looked much better when
she was Ravens ninja and had her ugly face covered!
Kane: Tori's a friend of mine...
Me: IS SHE GOOD IN BED?
Kane: I've never had sex with her...
Me: Oh yeah! Your cock was burnt off!
Me: Lol! That must be terrible! You can't even masturwank, dood!
Kane: I can chokeslam little punk on the internet though...
Me: Like Scott Keith? He sez you have a poor workrate! Chokeslam him to
Kane: Booker T warned me not to let you interview me....
Me: Did you kill your parents or did Undertaker? I can never remember!!
Kane: Ask Vince Russo!
Me: LOL! ROTFLMAO! OMG U ARE FUNNY!
Me: Funny for a retard!
Kane: That's it...
Me: That's what?
(My phone exploded in a ball of fire!)
Me: OMG HE HAS DEVIL POWERS!!!
Back SOMETIME with more hizzot newz doodz!!!!!!!!
Mail the Author
AUSTIN TO START SAYING
"TWAT" INSTEAD OF "WHAT" TO GIVE THE CENSORS NIGHTMARES? STACY KEIBLER TO
HAVE LEG REDUCTION SURGERY? ROCK TO STAR IN NEXT JAMES BOND MOVIE? WRITER
OF HOT NEWZ TO QUIT WRITING IT BECAUSE HE CAN'T COME UP WITH ANY FUNNY
IDEAS? PLUS HOT NAKED PICS OF SUNNY AND MISS HYATT...WHO AM I KIDDING, THEY
ARE DISGUSTING PICS! AND THE HOT NEWZ ARCHIVE CLICK HERE!!